Daniel Benor, MD, ABIHM

People who come for help with their problems often find themselves at a loss to understand what their problems are, how they developed, and how to sort them out. They just know that they are in pain, under stress, and experiencing some form of distress.

Often, when I ask, “What are you feeling about your problem?” the answers I get are about what people think about their problem. Common responses include:

“I feel I’m always being blamed for what is wrong between me and my partner.”

“I am comfortably well off financially, I have a good job and a lovely wife and great children. I feel I should be enjoying life more, but I’m always down in the dumps.”

“I feel it’s up to me to sort out the problems between my parents, who are always arguing and fighting.”

If we substituted the word ‘think’ for the word ‘feel’ in these sorts of statements, we would be closer to the truth about what people are saying. This is a symptom of people’s lack of familiarity with their feelings.

There is often some measure of truth in these mis-statements about thinking. There are feelings behind each statement that must be identified and dealt with in order to sort out the problems.

People often have little or no idea what is causing their problems; why these problems feel overwhelming at that particular time; or what to do to deal with them.

The therapist is challenged to figure out the answers to these questions. Frequently, there are hints from a person’s recent and past life experiences and relationships that might explain the problems. At the same time, there is the history of the person’s emotions that may provide the needed clues for sorting out what is going on.

Where to start may be a challenge. My personal preference is to start with the emotions, based on 45 years of working as a therapist.

WHEE has been particularly helpful in confirming that the file record systems of our memories are organized with various emotions on the labels of the file drawers and file folders. When we address the emotions in the presenting problems with WHEE, the troublesome issues of both present issues and the residues of past issues sitting in the same file drawers can be cleared. In fact, when we bundler the underlying past issues with the present issues then we achieve a much more thorough clearing out of whatever is troubling the person.

This is why I recommend that WHEE be used routinely with an affirmation format that starts with “Even though I feel…” By connecting with the feelings we can solidly connect with whatever is connected to the issues we are addressing – through our internal filing system.

Once we have connected with the feelings, we can connect with the all the memories and thoughts  that are relevant to those feeling issues. These cognitions can then be cleared, too.

While these distinctions may be clear to therapists and to people who are psychologically aware, there are many who go through life paying little attention to their inner lives. They may require some education and coaching to connect with and to understand their emotions.

I believe this is why some people find it more helpful to have a personal session to learn to use WHEE. This helps them to connect with the unfamiliar parts of themselves that are asking for their attention.

Your feedback on this article is welcomed.

You may reproduce all or parts of this article in your journal, magazine, ezine, blog or other web or paper publication on condition that you credit the source as follows: Copyright © 2011 Daniel J. Benor, MD, ABHM   All rights reserved. Original publication at WholisticHealingResearch.com where you will find many more related articles on this and similar subjects of wholistic healing. 

Further information about WHEE

Basics of the WHEE process

WHEE Videos

Appreciations for benefits of WHEE

Problems helped by WHEE

Book on WHEE for Pain 

WHEE workbook

WHEE workshops

Articles:
   Introductory WHEE article
 
   WHEE for trauma and re-entry problems 
 
   WHEE for children

   WHEE-kly brief articles

WHEE research