Rita Benor (now Ruth Benor Sewell, RN, PhD)           

...every form of authoritarian or highly-organised society is inimical to individual spiritual evolution, because it prevents the individual person from expressing and therefore facing his true self from which experience alone comes the desire for his own spiritual growth.
                                                                 Joan Cooper

       I have become aware of distinctions between psychological and spiritual interventions in doing research on women's psychological responses to radiotherapy implants for breast cancer.

       The formal aspect of my research focuses on these women's levels of information about their illness.  I introduce myself by saying, "I would like to talk with you about your thoughts and feelings about your illness."  A portion of my interview is structured and a portion is open-ended.

       I find that we can stay on the psychological level if I stick to intellectual discussions of hurts, feelings, thoughts and dreams.  These women are so ready, even eager, for someone to talk with.  Often they will very quickly share their fears, their tears and their many questions about the disease, their treatments, and the enormous changes these are bringing to their lives.  We can stay on the psychological level even though they may share deep feelings.

       We enter the spiritual levels when we switch off our heads and touch each other at a heart level.  I needn't say a word about this.  I think it's something in my voice.  It is opening up and setting aside all of the barriers between us.  I feel as though the whole system is open.  I intuitively feel that I have known them for a long time, although we only just met for the first time.  There is an awareness of inner guidance, with an inner knowing that this is not just a chance meeting.

       It is then that they open to share their questions and feelings about the meaning of life, their connections with God, their past religious experiences, their beliefs about what happens when we die, and the like.

      They speak of being afraid, of having lost their vision of the reasons and meanings for living.

      I suspected that I might be pushing them into such discussions.  To be sure that I was not, I several times asked women diverting questions about tangible matters, such as what the doctor had told them about the illness when the diagnosis was made.  They always returned to the point of spiritual distress.  Their willingness, even eagerness, to speak of spiritual matters is clear.

      As I allow this to happen more often and grow more confident in this level of being together, it happens more quickly in my interviews.  Within the first few minutes they have an inner knowing to open to spiritual matters.  I can sense that they both want and don't want to enter these areas.  My own openness to this encourages them to overcome their hesitations.

      Yet I find myself in conflict with myself over several issues.  In touching them at this deep level, there is the mutual awareness that we are cutting through layers of collusion in denials of illness, of feelings, of cultural biases and habits and the like.  There is a rapid recognition of something happening between us which transcends all these.  They know that I know that they know...

      I am abandoning professional social rules.  I am disobeying taboos to not speak of certain things.  I am inviting them to do this with me.  I am opening up awareness and feelings which might otherwise lie fallow and untouched.

      I am also in conflict with my role as a researcher.  The spiritual elements are outside the professionally acceptable definitions of my research protocol.  Perhaps I shall explore with my research supervisors whether spirituality might be included in the MPhil degree program.  Regardless of our final decision, I feel the openings we have achieved are valuable in and of themselves.

Rita Benor is a Lecturer in Palliative Care.  She is a member of the DHN London/Rustington/ Sevenoaks group.
 

You may quote from or reproduce these editorial clips if you include the following credits and email contact:
Copyright © Daniel J. Benor, M.D. 1992 Reprinted with permission of the author P.O. Box 76 Bellmawr, NJ 08099
www.WholisticHealingResearch.com   DB@WholisticHealingResearch.com 

RETURN TO TABLE OF CONTENTS FOR THIS NEWSLETTER